Tribute to Stuart Sandys, 1973 - 2025

A big rock has fallen into the water and there’s a ripple effect that is everything now if we’re to come to terms with this. For Stu’s work and friend family, I feel I can say for us all - the ever-widening ripples of his compassion, inclusion, generosity and thoughtfulness will stay with us. Always. Here’s some Stu-isms, advice and things I will never stop loving about him… in no particular order and a bit meanderingly chaotic (which I think he would approve of): Be kind. Be thoughtful. Buy outrageously nice gifts for people you love, even if they get annoyed – be extravagant anyway. Be blunt if someone’s a twat. Be endlessly patient if someone genuinely needs your help. Give your time freely. Wash everything at 90 degrees. Seriously – 30 does not cut it. Use bleach. A lot of it. Embrace the latest obsessions: trainers, gadgets, Thrudark, Lego, sparkling tea, Kylie… and as I found out today, Burlesque- thanks Tom! Don’t do ugly. Care. Really care. Ask questions. Reinvent. Also give others the courage to do this. Be inappropriate – but always at the appropriate moment. Only let special people ride in your Lady. Always squeegee the shower and fluff the cushions if you’re allowed a sleepover. A seafood platter and wine is always a good idea – even if you can’t attend the dinner party yourself. And be a little bit (read a ridick lot) late sometimes. They’ll understand, if they love u. Sleep well my darling friend 😘 We ALL miss you so much!

I've fond memories of Stu as a teenager working with his Dad Ray way back in the day, always had a cheeky smile. My condolences to his family & friends. I'm sharing a favourite poem & hope it brings you comfort & a smile. Death is nothing at all. It does not count. I have only slipped away in to the next room. Nothing has happened. Everything remains exactly as it was. I am I, and you are you, and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged. Whatever we were to each other, that we are still. Call me by the old familiar name. Speak of me in the easy way which you always used. Put no difference into your tone. Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow. Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together. Play, smile, think of me, pray for me. Let my name be ever the household word that it always was. Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it. Life means all that it ever meant. It is the same as it ever was. There is absolute and unbroken continuity. What is this death but a negligible accident? Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight? I am but waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just round the corner. All is well. Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost. One brief moment and all will be as it was before. How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again! 🫶

Thinking of you all at this difficult time.I went to Orleans Park with Stuartl.